I find myself constantly feeling like an imposter. I'm not sure where it comes from or how to combat it other than to just keep showing up and doing. I've heard imposter syndrome comes from having a lack of confidence or knowledge in what you're doing... I agree and disagree.
I am an extremely dimensional person, however I struggle with a sense of belonging because I tend to just 'fit' and belong wherever I seem to be in that moment. I can waltz at a black tie event and toast champagne, I can head and heel cows out on the ranch and drink whiskey straight, I can bust a rhyme with Tupac and slap that bass, or I can smash a killer leg day with my girlie pops and get a greens drink and acai bowl for recovery. You name it, I'm down for it.
However, I ALWAYS struggle to feel like I fit in or that I belong or that I'm showing up as my most authentic self because like bro... who am I? I struggle to know what I'm good at and passionate about because I'm passionate about everything but I get bored SO easily, mundane routines are NOT for this ADHD gal. I get anxiety when I show up to meetings, or head out on the big circle, or when I back in the box with a loop built or when I rack that 45# on the barbell... and it's not a nervous like I don't know what I'm doing... it's a nervous like "am I qualified to be here? Because 30 minutes ago I was doing XYZ which is totally irrelevant to this." However, once the lifts start lifting, the miles start getting long trotted, or I watch my perfect curl come around on my calf or I start pitching my ideas and closing on deals in meetings... it ALL feels like home. It ALL feels right and like I'm meant to be there. I feel like I'm an imposter because I constantly am wearing so many masks for so many tasks and which one is just... me, ya know?
I guess I just struggle with knowing if I'll ever be "successful" at something because I enjoy SO many things.
I guess take this as me seeing you and you seeing me, let this validate you to be multifaceted, multi-passionate and well rounded. I have found that the company you keep helps keep these thoughts-- these demons at bay. Surround yourself with a circle who see's you for you, who calls you on your shit, is the first to have your back, like and comment on your posts, hype you up and support whatever crazy endeavor your onto next, cheers the loudest.
Find comfort in just rolling with it and leaning into the weird imposter feelings because the only way to get through it... is well, I guess to go through it. We can hold hands if you want, maybe it wont be so scary if we go together. Maybe I am the epitome of "I just want to do hood rat shit with my friends." Who knows. Wanna be my friend? Wanna do hood rat shit together?
Anyways, stay wild. Stay unorthodox. Stay a Maverick.